My last blog post was a bout relationship repair, and in it I mentioned that for ten years before I met my now husband I was in a relationship with an active alcoholic.
To finally heal and successfully remove myself from the relationship I give all glory to God.
I would also recommend a few things to anyone else who is struggling in that same scenario.
1 - Get help. Join Alanon. Or Coda. It is free and they even have phone meetings if you cannot attend in person.
2 - Give it up to God. Let him handle these big issues, you just do your part.
3 - Read. While most people like Codependent No More, I preferred Women Who Love to Much by Robin Horwood. LIFE CHANGING FOR ME.
4 - Reflect. What about your relationship now, your triggers and your spouse reminds you of your childhood? Keep on journal on this, it is powerful.
5 - Forgive yourself. You are human.
6 - Have positive daydreams about what your ideal future looks like. I clung to these during those lonely times.
7 - Listen to affirmations daily. You can find free ones on YouTube to listen to while going about your day.